If looks could kill...
I hate walking on the streets in Male', I really do. Why? Because people friggin' stare so much. What is their problem? And even if you catch them staring, they'd still stare back as if its not at all rude or anything. Bah..Maldivians..If only they'd at least do it subtly I wouldn't complain so much.
What I've noticed also is that it's mostly the women who stare at other women. Before I always thought I was imagining it and I'm being paranoid but recently me and my guy (lets call him Dhonkalo) went out for a bite and we came across a bunch of girls at the door. The moment they saw me they were like just glaring at me looking me up and down as if i had just mugged their grandma or something! :S I was oookay..(gulp) and just meekly and hurriedly went inside past them. I still thought nah they must Its prolly just me when Dhonkalo remarked, "Haadha rulhi aissa ey dho ebely" I was like bingo! It's not just me! They do stare like vultures..almost foaming at the mouth they were yesh!
Some people might say oh women just look at other women to check out what they are wearing. I also do that if i see someone wearing something drool worthy. But I always make sure they don't catch me while doing it. Also I don't glare at random women. Or maybe I should? Maybe it's some feminine gene I'm missing like the mother gene (that's for another post)
Others say that they are just jealous. I'd believe that if it were the ugly women who stare, but nooo these are actually good looking women who actually feel so insecure that they need to look down on other women. I just don't get it at all.
Then of course there are the ones who say that those are lesbians..but trust me their stares smoulder in a whole different way. Point is, weren't they taught at all that openly just staring at someone is just rude? It makes me so uncomfortable, like I just don't enjoy going out at all because of it. But lately since I ruined my contacts it has been easier since I am half blind and oblivious to all the staring. Ignorance is bliss.
What is it about people here that makes them want to look up and stare at them whenever someone enters a coffee shop? Sure, looking up is a reflex, but have they not heard of common etiquette??? Constantly, just constantly it feels like someone is analyzing me up and down. It's not just the staring..then they start staring and whispering. And all you hear are "psss pspspsss eyna pss pss" So annoying!
So I plan to master the art of not seeing them. Just pretend they don't exist. (It's pretty hard at times when someone is trying to burn a hole in your forehead though) So yeah I shall try to ignore them..hence will achieve bliss. Wish me luck.
Comments
"One of disconcerting things about life in Maldives is that it’s normal to stare, not just at out-of-place Westerners like us but at everyone else, especially women (as someone from the US Embassy warned us, it’s more like leering). This seems jarring and unexpected for a strait-laced Islamic country, but it’s just the way things are. Maldivians are reserved and show little emotion, but once you know them they open up a bit. Anthropologist Clarence Maloney suggested that these people “who live a lifetime confined with the same fellow-islanders are bound to be restrained in exhibition of their emotion.” Since Maldivians live virtually on top of each other they must repress feelings, speaking quietly and with few gestures, meeting everything with a stoical calm. In short, they are polar opposites of our three year-old Gwen, who, as she runs screaming in circles, hands above head, tries to show them another way to live. She draws lots of stares"
http://www.hsc.edu/academics/biology/werth/03-08-2006.html
Anon: Pretty interesting..Thanks :)
It sometimes goes rather far. For example, you pass by a person who is entering a building, and he/or she might actually stop on the threshold and take a couple of seconds to stare at you before going in.
Sometimes I find it really hard to resist flipping them off.
& whats taking that frikking plastic surgeon so long!!
u know, u cant blame someone if s/he stares at something out of the ordinary. & im not talking about the people who need special attention ;) but yeah, there would be more decent ways. like a pair of sunglass!!
Crawler: Hehe girl watching is also an art.
It worked too well for me. :P
I can use you for my research. As a contributor, of course. Not a test subject.
strider: teach me that look! :D
Iya: count me in ^^
perhaps these stares are part of their judging process.putting people in to categories. labelling them. analysing their history. whoz daughter is that? where does she live?who was her boyfriend. was she married? is she a slut? how slutty? what comment can i make about her dress? ...these are questions that need to be answered. observing the subject carefully is of utmost importance.
Extra benefit: Carrying that huge piece is a great workout, and will help you stay toned and balanced.
Its more of a south asian thing..I am someone who gets stared constantly.. ( yes I dont fit into the 'prototype')..
One of the worst staring incident was in Nepal, when I had this guy walk with me for around 15 mins .. just staring at me up and down.. first he was behind me then.. right beside me for like 10 mins and then infront of me..yes he was turning back for another 5 mins.. I thought I had sprouted an extra head or something!!!!
Another staring scenario is when I get on a bus...all eyes are turned towards me and they start whispering.. my friend jokingly say its Channel Shanoo time.. believe me a bus full of people.. confined spaces is not a good place to be..
Oh well..
I am oblivious to my surroundings after being Channel Shanoo...I mean I wasnt going to let a bunch of ignorant people stop me from doing and going where I wanted..
People who dont matter to me are irrelevant..
"we look to see what the girl is wearing, whether if its fashionable, does it look good on her, will it look good on me if i wore that, whose the guy she's with, is it someone i know, is he hot or not, does she deserve him or not, why is SHE with him or why is HE with her, do they match or is it jes weird" :s beats me! hehe
but you are right about the glaring by girls. its like they hate you for breathing!!!